Three Easy Ways to Love Yourself More


What is love? What are the different types of love, and which ones, if at all, are important? Generally, we idealize (or loath) passionate and romantic love; however, I’m going to propose a different discussion--one on the transformative power of self-love.


For a moment, think. Do you believe self-love is important? And if so, why? How often do you love yourself? How? Do you find it easy or difficult? How do you respond to yourself when you find loving yourself to be challenging?


Self-Love Opens Our Doors For Source


There are no right or wrong answers; none-the-less, I’ll be honest in that I’m biased. I believe with all my heart that self-love is not only important, but vital for wellness, happiness, and connection. The reason why I believe in the power of self-love is because as a believer in light, and light being Grace from Source (or God), I believe light always illuminates, inspires, heals, transforms, elevates, and brings about awareness. Also, you guessed it-- light is love!


With Abundant Light, We Can Share



Bring this concept back to love, what does love and light have to do with each other? It seems to me that when we love others we create a doorway by which the light can be funneled and concentrated through. Yet, if we don’t love ourselves first, we do not receive as much direct light from Source. In other words, self-love is how we remain receptive to Divine light, which in return provides us with excess love to share. Self-love is how we absorb the Grace of Source. This then creates meaning for us individually and we are more likely to actualize into our fullest potentials. Moreover, because we are interconnected beings, our spillover of light, cultivated through being receptive by means of self-love in the first place, spreads to brighten the world. Thus, real self-love, not narcissism, is altruistic and compassionate. It’s fulfilling our role in the ecosystem of humanity. Literally, the act of self-love illuminates more light, love, Grace, and Source into the world. What an incredible gift!


Difficulties with Self-Love


Now, I’ll be the first to admit, I’m not always the best at loving myself unconditionally. I’m often self-critical, demeaning of myself, think I’m undeserving, and perpetually feel the need to “prove” myself. I can’t say why exactly. My counseling background may lead me to conceptualize about interpersonal, attachment, and early childhood issues. Yet, it seems to me that the bottom line is lack of love creates a negative feedback loop. Once in motion, it’s challenging to pivot 180 degrees. Therefore, even if foreign or awkward, likely the place to begin with is loving ourselves.


Possible Outcomes of Self-Love


Who knows? In this process we could not only find more happiness, acceptance, meaning, and healing, but we may also find more connections and intimacy with others. Additionally, people tend to mirror back how we treat ourselves. Thereby, if we love ourselves we are modeling to them that we are worthy of being loved and they may reflect that! Either way, it seems harmless to self-love, and likely to be a win-win.


How Do You Love Yourself?


Ok. But now what? How do we self-love? This is a BIG question and surely the answers are endless, and personal to each of us.

To kick off this discussion, some of the ways I love myself are watching myself talk, taking baths, and practicing a heart chakra balancing technique.


Being Self-Compassionate with Every Word and Thought



As far as being mindful of myself talk, I work on catching and rephrasing statements that are self-deprecating. Similar to how I wouldn’t speak ill of others, I want to treat myself differently. I also want to forgive myself for when I “mess up,” and learn from my lessons, realizing I’m growing. This is easier said than done! It takes practice and I often fake it a bit before it feels more natural. I often struggle with self-judgment through this process too, in which case,  I then notice that and try to be kind to that internal critic as well. Compassionate self-talk is an ongoing process. It takes lots of practice and never ends.


Bath Time!


A more simple way that I love myself is by taking personal space in the bath. I use a water purifier to avoid harmful fluoride and other toxins, two cups sea salt or Epsom salt to cleanse my aura, crystals, and my beloved Young Living essential oils. You can click here to learn how to order essential oils. 

You can even try Young Living's Stress Away Bath Bomb, featured on the right. 

For the ambiance, positive ions, and increased vibrations, I love lighting beeswax candles and playing 528 Hz music in the background. 528 Hz is the love and healing frequency. You can simply search YouTube.


Heart Chakra Balancing Technique



    In addition to being mindful with my words and thoughts, and taking personal relaxation time in the bath, another way I self-love is through meditating (and using Reiki) on my heart chakra. If you desire to practice this heart chakra balancing technique, herein are the steps:


  1. Began by being still. Focus on your breath. When you have a thought or distraction, have it, then let it pass with your breath.

  2. Once you feel settled into your body, bring your attention to your heart chakra (in the middle of your chest).

  3. Breath as if you are breathing in and out of your heart chakra.

  4. Then in your mind’s eye, visualize in your heart chakra a bright, emerald green crystal rotating in a smooth and balanced fashion.

  5. With each breath, visualize the breath filling and enlarging the green crystal--becoming bigger and brighter.

  6. Now, see more green light radiating from the green crystal. Again, with each breath the crystal radiates more green light. Continue on this step until the radiating green light envelops your whole body.  

  7. Feel this light. Notice what it feels like. Believe this is an all healing, loving, truthful, knowing, and pure. It can transform anything! Emotional, physical, situational and other distresses-- if only you allow the light to radiate and sink into every cell and aspect of both your physical and energetic bodies.

  8. Stay in this place for as long as you like.

  9. When you are ready, visualize the green crystal spinning and pulling all of that green light back in. See the light concentrating inward toward your heart chakra.

  10. Once all of the light is concentrated back into the crystal, see this too condensed in size and melt into your heart. All of that wonderful loving energy will now be with you at all times.  


    Please note, to heighten this meditation, you may use rose or lavender essential oils (because of quality and purity, I only recommend Young Living Essential Oils) on your heart chakra, place a rose quartz crystal on your heart chakra, or use Reiki. If you are not Reiki attuned and are curious, please stay tune to other articles by subscribing to the newsletter.

Also, you can take your time with this meditation. You can take a half hour and really marinate into the experience, or you can do it quickly anywhere for a few moments. Some places where I use this exercise are in a traffic jam and when I’m triggered.




Hopefully, this got your juices running on how to love yourself more! How do you love yourself? 

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